Broken Glass Makes Me Laugh

This may seem cruel, mocking and unpleasant to you. And I do not disagree that it has its vile and childish side. But comedy has no friends, mad people are funny, and it's not news that I'm an arsehole sometimes.
-- Warren Ellis

Friday, February 24, 2006

Mirror image

Despite deciding a few weeks ago that buying comics while unemployed was irresponsible, I went to the comic store last week. What�s worse, I picked up the all the stuff that I�d skipped from the previous week, so even my initial self control was wasted.

Moving right by my poor impulse control, something in one of the books jumped out at me and I wanted to share. This is a two page spread from the last issue of Y: The Last Man, the picture on the left is an ad and the one on the right is a story page:


Is the placement of the two images coincidence? An editor with a sense of humour? A commentary on the relationship between sex and death? Probably just the first one, but I thought it worth pointing out.

Sunday, February 19, 2006

Bad character design



How does the guy on the left go to the bathroom? Perhaps he's so devoted to killing that even hygiene is secondary. On the other hand (ha!), maybe his poorly thought out surgical enhancement is the reason he's so angry all the time. "With my new hands, I'll be unstoppable. Wait... how do I take the lid off this jar?" What I find particularly strange is that I think I own the comic where that character was introduced over a decade ago, and the question of his day to day activities never occurred to me until I saw this image.

Regardless, his career choice as evil assassin is pretty much set with those mits, kind of like the guy in this Hitman story:



(For some reason, lately, everything reminds me of a Garth Ennis comic)

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

A comic shop tour of Vancouver

I started this blog one year ago today. My first post was a valentine to comics in the form of a list of 100 things I love about comics (all the cool kids were doing it), and in many ways this blog itself continues to be a love letter to comics. I’m celebrating my first year of blogging and kicking off my second by taking you on a virtual tour of Vancouver and showing you the shops that fed my habit. Have you ever heard of the “ghost tours” some cities have where they take you to all the haunted sites? This is like that except with comics.
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The first comic store I ever visited was called Camelot Comics. I found out about them when their business card fell out of a library book I was about to sign out. The card had an image of a dragon flying in a ring, with its head by its tail. The imagery was appropriately ouroboros-like, because this store was the beginning and the end for me. The idea of a store that stocked nothing but comics blew my mind, and finding the card in such a random way gave the moment an Arthurian/ Willy Wonka type feel. Needless to say, seeing a store packed full of comics was even better than I’d imagined, and as soon as I walked through the doors I was done for.

Camelot Comics closed a few years later, and in the years since we also lost Gotham, Fourth Dimension, and Foot’s (later called RC Pitstop). What follows is a rundown of the stores open in and around Vancouver today.
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We’ll begin our magical mystery tour in downtown Vancouver and work our way outwards. The first stop is Golden Age Collectibles, near the busy shopping corner of Granville and Robson, what I’d call the heart of downtown. My friend Pat owns this store, and they’ve been in the same location over twenty-five years, since 1979. Almost. When I visited Vancouver in October, Janis told me that the store had moved a few doors down. I didn’t believe her, because, quite frankly, Janis is a pathological liar, and I figured that she’d just gotten mixed up while in a drug addled haze. For once, however, she turned out to be telling the truth, as earlier this year the store had up and moved four doors over.

Of all the stores I’ve been to, I think Golden Age is the most civilian friendly. This is the place I take non-regular comics readers to trick them into reading comics. The store is well laid out, accessible, and displays comics in ways that will appeal to the novice, while still having an extensive enough stock for the lunatic compulsive, such as myself. The new location is slightly smaller than the old one, but has even more of a cool, bookstore kind of feel to it now. Golden Age is the Chapters or the Barnes & Noble of comic shops. The store is modern and well lit, and the staff are friendly and professional. (Moreover, this is the only store on the list that has multiple women working there). While the back issue selection is limited, you can find anything new here.
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The next stop is the Elfsar Collection, a newer store that opened just a few years ago.



This shop is located in Vancouver’s trendy Yaletown neighbourhood, which is a refurbished warehouse district that now houses expensive boutiques and restaurants. I’ve only been in the Elfsar Collection a few times, so my impressions are limited, but the store is well organized and modern, and the staff have been friendly and welcoming on each visit. The store carries plenty of comics, but they’ve also got imported art books, lots of DVDs, and a gallery of original art.

I like visiting there, but I wonder how long they’ll be able to stay in such an expensive neighbourhood that gets so little foot traffic. The store also needs to do something with their exterior, as none of the window displays draw attention. The first time I came here I walked by the place several times without noticing it. If someone who’s looking for the store can’t find it I don’t know if a casual passerby would give it a second glance.
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ABC Book and Comic Emporium is the final store before we leave downtown.



This shop is on the same street as Golden Age, but down in the slightly seedier end, right before the bridge out of town. These guys moved from across the street a few years ago, and in the new location most of the main floor is taken up with used books, and hence the feel is that of an old used book store. New comics are located on the main floor too, as are several shelves so packed with hardcovers, tpbs, and books about comics that my head hurts whenever I try to scan what’s there.

If you go down the stairs and into the basement, you find the store’s extensive back issue collection. They’re currently having a 50% off sale on back issues. My friend Pat at Golden Age said once that he only holds sales once a year (New Year’s Day) because if you do it more frequently people hold off on buying things in anticipation of the next sale. He may have been right, because ABC’s 50% off back issue sales used to be semi-annual, but the current one is entering its sixth or seventh year.
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Leaving downtown now, just across the Burrard Street bridge and to the right on West 4th, we find the aptly named Comicshop.



The Kitsilano neighbourhood is young, urban, and professional, and West 4th is yet another shopping district, crammed with clothing stores and restaurants. Along with Golden Age Collectibles, The Comicshop is one of the twin pillars of Vancouver comics retail; these two are the big kids. Both are inviting to all sorts of comics readers, but while Golden Age, in its sleekness, leans more towards drawing in casual buyers, The Comicshop is the addict’s heaven. The best way I can think to describe the feel is that when you walk into The Comicshop, you can smell the newsprint, and it is good.

The Comicshop has three floors: gaming stuff in the basement (I believe. I’ve never been down there); a lobby-like main floor, with an entrance, a load of pop art and comics related books, and toys; and sweet, sweet comics upstairs. The comics floor has an ample supply of back issues, a good selection of new stuff, multiple shelves of indy comics, numerous comics magazines, and all of it is just right. They have a monthly (?) newsletter, and a good semi-annual sale (April and October).
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The next stop is Rx Comics, and they’ve got the potion that can cure your disease. >Ahem<



This place is also somewhat new, the guy inside said they’ve been here on Main Street for about three years. I’ve only been here the one time, so I can’t say much about them, but they do have a welcoming set up. Located amidst used bookstores, vintage clothing shops, and counterculture outlets, this store seems to cater to an alternative/ underground crowd. The material on their shelves suggests the same, as while they carry the usual books from the big four, they’ve also got an ample supply of mini comics and independent books that I’d never seen before. The guy was friendly, and they’ve got this great sign out front.



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Heading up Main Street, we come to Lucky’s.



I’d never been to this store before, or ever heard of it, but my friend Zoe took me here on my last trip to Vancouver. The shop is tiny, but they use what little space they have to stock loads of independent and alternative comics and art books. This place is where I’d come to find my Chris Ware. Upon entering, you see that the front wall is covered with a series of little framed drawings, and apparently different artists are showcased over time. Zoe’s boyfriend George, who is an artist, frequents the shop, and I’d imagine that the clientele is similarly artist types in the know. Lucky’s gets a special mention on my list because on my visit I scored a cheap copy of the Shuck tpb I’d been hunting for years. (In a supreme case of irony, when I looked up the Shuck link to slot into the previous sentence I found that the whole series is now available for free online).
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Leaving Vancouver now, we head into the suburbs and find the Tazmanian Comic Connection, named of course after the Tasmanian Devil.



Taz is a high quality comic store located on the fringes of civilization on Hastings Street in North Burnaby. I began visiting here regularly when I worked at the unnamed software giant down the street. The owner is gregarious and friendly and he learned my name the second time I visited and five years later still remembers. Shamefully, I never learned his and now I feel too embarrassed to ask. They’ve got good deals and an excellent selection of new, old, toys, statues, cards, and whatever you might want. Unfortunately, this excellent comic store is tainted by the fact that an ex- lives right up the street (she was the devil too, if you get my drift). Let us leave here and never speak of this place again.
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Going south into New Westminster, we come to Talkin’ Illustrations. This comics store was the second one I ever visited and the place where I rode out the boom of the late 80s and early 90s. Back then, Talkin’ Illustrations was the cock of the walk, with signings and release events galore. At this store I met Todd McFarlane, Eric Larsen, Chris Warner, Javier Saltares, and list of others whose names get progressively less impressive as I go on. The early 90s were heady days; we were living large, buying multiple copies, and snorting coke off of hookers’-- well, you get the idea. A friend of mine still carries a grudge from that time because he feels that the owner of this store took advantage of the fact that we were kids and incited us to buy multiple copies of comics that were eventually worthless. I’m not angry, though, because when I look at this shop that is a shell of its former glory I know that he’s gotten his.
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And finally, we finish up in the city of Surrey at Triple Play Collectibles.



This store is my local comic shop, and they’re currently in their third location (which isn’t to say that they’re a chain, they’ve just moved twice). The new location is a little out of the way, so I worry about whether they’re getting enough casual customers, but they seem to be doing okay. This store is everything I want in a local comic shop. They have a large selection of monthlies, including all but the most obscure comics, and they get in anything I order with a minimum of fuss. Anything. (It wasn’t for me, alright?). I like going here too because it’s a place where everybody knows my name, and I like to be where I can see our troubles are all the same. Sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name. Okay I’m done.
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So that’s Vancouver, or at least all the important parts. I did miss a few stores, like Comic Land on Rupert (which has the best awning in the business), Greyhaven out in White Rock, and that place in Port Moody, but seriously, what do think, I’m made of driving? I’ll get to those next time I’m back home.

Thanks for reading.

Monday, February 13, 2006

Friendly fire

Remember Hitman, Garth Ennis’s superhero action comedy book? Do you remember the issues that had Section Eight, the group of reject superheroes? And one of the guys on the team was named Friendly Fire? Here’s the scene where he get recruited, in case you don’t:

And remember how his powers were that he could shoot blasts out of his hands, but he could only hit team-mates? Here he is in action:


Remember? Now, wouldn’t it be funny if he was Vice President of the United States?
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The interweb is abuzz with the news that VP Cheney wounded another hunter while shooting at a bird. I wasn't going to comment, but I ran across two sites this morning that I thought I'd pass on.

The first is an animation of the Vice President called "Cheney's got a gun" with the corresponding Aerosmith song playing in the background. The animation is crap and there isn't much of a joke once you get past the Janie = Cheney thing, but it made me laugh when I heard it.

The other chuckle came from Al Franken's response over at The Huffington Post:
Over the weekend, Vice President Dick Cheney shot a man in Texas. Asked why he shot the man, the Vice President said, "Just to watch him die."
There's one more funny bit in it, and it's only half a page long, so go take a look.
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I wasn't going to say anything about what happened because the whole thing seems to be kind of a non-event (aside from the guy getting shot). It's not like Cheney shot the guy on purpose; accidents happen and fortunately the other guy is alright. The situation would be different if the guy had died or if Cheney had been hunting him in a The Most Dangerous Game type scenario; then I could understand getting worked up about it.* As it is, the entire incident is unfortunate and it's lucky nobody was killed. If anything, the other guy comes away with some cool scars and gets to tell his grandkids about the time grandpa got shot in the face by the Vice President and then walked away.

What bugs me is the pre-emptive reaction on the Right. As a rule, I don't like to talk about or acknowledge her, but right wing wack job Michelle Malkin said something yesterday that bugged me on a couple of levels (as opposed to the usual five or six levels):
The Dems will exploit this accident to smear Cheney as incapable of being trusted, weak of mind, etc. The resignation rumors will fly again. And the biography of a man who has served this country so well and so honorably for so many years will be overshadowed by a single, ill-fated hunting mishap.

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Reader C.T. writes: "I'd rather hunt with Dick Cheney than ride with Ted Kennedy ."
As usual, Malkin is devoid of any sense of irony in regards to her own writing, as she puts that top statement next to the bottom one without blinking.

What really bugs me here is the hypocrisy of her “Republicans are so hard done by” sentiments. Imagining the colossal shit storm that would have erupted if Al Gore had shot someone by accident during Clinton’s second term drains away my sympathies pretty quickly. The Right would have peed themselves in anticipation upon hearing the news, and never mind resignation, Pat Robertson probably would have called for Gore to be executed.

Malkin’s opinion piece is more than just casual hypocrisy, though. Instead of waiting for a reaction from the left she acts like the reaction is a given: “The Dems will exploit”, “rumors will fly”, Cheney’s biography “will be overshadowed”. In the minds of Malkin’s readers, the Democrats are already taking advantage of the shooting to tear Cheney down. No one will ever call her out if the Democrats react differently, and if even one commentator does take Cheney to task, Malkin’s assertions are validated. Malkin thrives on taking fringe elements and isolated actions and using them to represent the whole. In this respect, calling her nuts, as I did above, helps her out by distracting from how dangerous and crafted her rhetoric is.
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* As usual, this reminds me of an Onion article.

Friday, February 10, 2006

A big "Eff You"

Preacher readers may remember the scene with the character who responds to getting kicked out of NASA's astronaut program by crafting a giant sign in the desert for astronauts to read from orbit. If not, here's a refresher:



Now, life imitates Ennis, as Google Maps spots a 40-metre profanity from space.

Thursday, February 09, 2006

You DO NOT talk about Fight Club

But if you want to sing about it, go right ahead. The Indian movie industry has a long history of remaking foreign films into domestic blockbusters, and past examples include Reservoir Dogs, The Rock, and King Kong(!). I've even blogged before about the Bollywood remake of Superman.

The latest movie to get the South Asian treatment is Fight Club. I'm guessing, based on the trailers behind that link and on past experience, that all subtext and social commentary will be replaced by over the top fight scenes and multiple musical numbers. And really, that seems like a fair trade.
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Past experience also suggests that the Indian Fight Club will have a somewhat more conventional love story than the Hollywood version, but if you can't wait, here's a trailer that recuts the English movie to look like a romantic comedy.
(via BoingBoing)
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Only slightly less ridiculous (from an old article at The Onion): The First Rule Of The Quilting Society Is You Don't Talk About The Quilting Society.

As with a lot of stuff at the Onion, the title is pretty much the whole joke, so I don't really think you need to follow that link and read the whole article.
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And finally, Phil Noto draws Tyler Durden:

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Images and links

When the X-Men 3 trailer debuted a couple of months ago, some of the shots seemed familiar, but I couldn't figure out where I'd seen them before. Recently something clicked in my head and I dug up this image:



Which bears a striking resemblance to this shot from the movie:



I don't think the second one is necessarily a lift of the first, but the similarities are striking.
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Spiderwords has a couple of Neil Gaiman poems up. Both are good, although I liked the first one, "The Day the Saucers Came", a little better than the second. Go read them, even if normally you don't read poems. Just do it.

(via BoingBoing)
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And while you're clicking around, go watch this animated United Airlines commercial. It's the one on the far right, called "Dragon." It's short and you'll like it, I promise.

(via Drawn!)
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Something else I spotted on Drawn!, a link to two video clips showing animated water. It's a lot more impressive than it sounds, go watch.
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And finally, to steal from The Daily Show, here's your daily moment of zen:
President Washington, President Lincoln, President Wilson, President Roosevelt have all authorized electronic surveillance on a far broader scale.

- U.S. Attorney General Alberto Gonzales before the Senate Judiciary Committee hearing on eavesdropping.
Crooks and Liars has the video clip.

Sunday, February 05, 2006

Superbowl ads and a couple of other clips

Just got back from a Superbowl party at my friend Paul #3's place. The game was alright, but the commercials were an added treat this year. The Canadian broadcast doesn't carry the commercials that U.S. audiences get to see, but somehow Paul3's ginormous TV had all the good ads. I didn't talk to Paul, so I don't know for sure why we saw the American broadcast, but I think it was because of the fact that for such a glorious TV set to not receive the unaltered broadcast would be a crime against nature, so the universe itself rearranged the way TV signals work for the duration of the game so we could watch the proper version. But I'm just speculating.

The crowd at the house was noisy throughout the game, offering lots of back seat quarterbacking and jeering at bad calls, but during the commercials, the room quieted to see what advertisers paid $2.5 million apiece to show us. One of the best commercials of the night was Mastercard's MacGyver spot, and when I got home I found that IFilm has already put the rest of the commercials up. Most of the ads weren't anything special, but from the ones on the page you should take time to watch (in order of entertainment value)
Sprint: Locker Room
Ameriquest Mortgage Co: That Killed Him
and Budweiser: Superfan.

To a lesser extent, I also liked
Degree: Stunt City

Bud Light: On the Roof

and Michelob Ultra: Touch Football
Although that last one would be much better without the cop out ending.
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While we're talking internet clips, if you haven't seen these two already, watch Brokeback to the Future, which recuts Back to the Future III to suggest a romance between Marty and Doc, and this Sleepless in Seattle trailer, which remixes the movie to look like a thriller.

Friday, February 03, 2006

Unmasked!

Last spring, over at Without Me You're Only You, Des posted this photo of himself and Le Visage Rouge from his trip to the comic museum in Brussels:

When confronted by suggestions that he and Le Visage Rouge might be the same person, Des carefully avoided answering the question. I'm sure he thought no one noticed his evasiveness. Well, I noticed, and now, through tireless detective work and with the help of my trusty Photoshop, I've managed to (literally) produce the evidence for what I've long suspected.

Evade that, Des. As I've yearned to say if I ever encounter Michael Flatley, Lord of the Dance: "The jig is up!" Now the world knows your dirty little secret.

Thursday, February 02, 2006

Belly laugh

Not having a job is really starting to suck. I am so unemployed that yesterday I didn't buy new comics. I'm sure that has very little meaning for the non-comics reading civillians reading this, but the Wednesday regulars should know how dire your circumstances have to be for you not to hit the store on new comic day. That's where I am. I was going to head to the store, and then I decided on the way there that considering my finances and the utter lack of interest companies are displaying in hiring me, that buying comics this week would be irresponsible. So no new comics.

I'm so depressed.
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In defiance of circumstances, today's entry is about laughing.

I scanned this from the inside of an Earth, Wind, and Fire record cover at work (back when I had a... well, you know). I've decided that from now on I'm going to laugh like that guy in the blue.

Better yet, I want someone to say something so funny that I have to laugh that big.
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Here's a link to a poster parodying Ringu, the Japanese horror movie that The Ring was based on.
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And finally, after way too long digging in the archives, I recently managed to find my favourite Tom Tomorrow strip. Enjoy: